The 5 Guidelines of Uncooked Underground & The Agony of HBK

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WWE Raw Shawn Michaels shields us from ungodly horror on WWE Raw. - The 5 Rules of Raw Underground, The Agony of HBK

Uncooked is doing its finest to promote us on SummerSlam, principally by ending all of the matches in interference so we now have no selection however to tune into the PPV simply hoping to see a clear end. It is now time for the third and closing hour of Uncooked, which suggests it is time for the return of all people’s favourite underground struggle membership, Uncooked Underground!

Shawn Michaels shields us from ungodly horror on WWE Uncooked.

WWE Uncooked Report for 8/16/2020 Half 3

Uncooked Underground is in progress. Erik of the Viking Raiders is thrashing the crap out of a blonde man. Dolph Ziggler is hanging out with Shane McMahon. McMahon asks Dolph to fee Erik’s efficiency. Dolph provides him a four out of 10. Shane thinks it must be greater. Erik needs Ziggler within the ring. Ziggler accepts.

Erik vs. Dolph Ziggler – Uncooked Underground

  • Ziggler tries to wrestle in opposition to Erik’s strikes.
  • Erik appears to be successful with strikes and takedowns.
  • However Dolph will get a choke and after an apparently authorized eye poke, will get the win.
  • Ivar tosses Ziggler into the gang and Shane is upset. He says Uncooked Underground shall be proper again.
  • So apparently, eye pokes are authorized however attacking your opponent after the match and throwing him into the gang is not.
  • Bought it. I feel.

Rey Mysterio and Dominik Mysterio come out to the ring. Appears like commentary was proper.

Promo – Rey and Dominik Mysterio

Dominik continues to promote his accidents from the beating final week. Rey says that he is been experiencing ache the previous couple of weeks, at first due to what Seth Rollins did to him by ripping his eyeball out, however even worse due to what Rollins did to Dominik. It made Rey really feel rage as a result of he wasn’t there to guard his son, cease the beating, and take the beating himself so Dominik did not should undergo. Rey says he is not absolutely recovered from his eye damage and he might by no means absolutely get better, however there is not any physician on Earth that may cease him from defending his son.

Rey says Seth is not gonna repeat what he did to Dominik as a result of Rey shall be in Dominik’s nook to look at him kick Rollins’s ass in a road struggle. Dominik says he appreciates that, however he knew what he was in for when he signed his contract to turn into a WWE Celebrity and he is aware of what he has to do to defend his household. He’ll be prepared. They hug. Rey tells Dominik he is pleased with him and he admires his dedication and can to defend the household identify. He is aware of Dominik will win at SummerSlam, and if Seth Rollins messes with them tonight, he will not make it to SummerSlam.

Rollins seems on the Titantron (with Murphy) and calls Mysterio an fool. He says Rey is placing Dominik at risk tonight for his personal private glory. It is at all times been about Rey. Rey is so egocentric. What sort of father is he? Rollins cannot perceive why he continues to place himself and his son in these conditions. Rey might have prevented this from the get-go by not resisting Rollins and accepting his function within the larger good. However Rey nonetheless hasn’t realized. The tragedy is that it will not simply be Rey and his son, however the Mysterio identify and legacy that would be the final sacrifice. (Good things right here. Rollins is often too rambly, however he is centered right here and it is working.)

Rey tells Rollins to come back all the way down to the ring and again up his phrases. Rollins says he is bought one eye and his child cannot arise straight. Keep in mind, he requested for this. Rollins tells them to not transfer an inch and he and Murphy stroll off digicam. Rollins’s music performs. You understand, they’ve skipped a whole lot of entrances tonight, simply beginning with individuals within the ring, and I feel that is actually helped the present in a delicate manner, not solely by bettering the pacing, however by making the entrances that do occur extra thrilling. For instance, right here it prolonged the stress as Rollins and Murphy got here to the ring.

As Rollins and Murphy get within the ring, the Mysterios again out. Rollins and Murphy taunt them. Dominik leans in opposition to the barrier as Rey circles the ring and tries to climb in. However it was all to distract them as Dominik grabs some kendo sticks when their backs are turned and assaults. Rey joins in they usually ship Murphy out of the ring. They beat Rollins with the kendo sticks. Rollins is carrying a shirt although. Rollins and Murphy escape.

Backstage, MVP approaches Cedric Alexander. He stirs the pot about Cedric not getting picked by Apollo Crews earlier to hitch him in opposition to the Damage Enterprise. Cedric tries to blow him off, however MVP has a silver tongue. He sows doubt with slightly dose of reality about Cedric’s associates not standing up for him when he did not get picked. Alexander tosses a water bottle in anger after MVP leaves. Uncooked goes to commercials.

Tom Phillips shills for Uncooked Speak tonight, that includes Lana, Natalya, and the Avenue Income. Then Shane McMahon welcomes us again to Uncooked Underground for a match between Arturo Ruas and Riddick Moss.

Arturo Ruas vs. Riddick Moss – Uncooked Underground

  • I feel I heard Shane McMahon say the referee is called “Spider.” Both that or the timekeeper.
  • These two have a brutal hanging struggle with a few slams thrown in.
  • Finally, Arturo works the knee they usually roll out of the ring.
  • They every knock out a number of individuals within the crowd.
  • Shane McMahon declares that was “sick” and subsequently the match is over they usually each win I assume.
  • What the hell?

Apollo Crews, Ricochet, and Mustafa Ali are within the ring. Damage Enterprise comes out.

Apollo Crews, Ricochet, and Mustafa Ali vs. Damage Enterprise

  • Sorry, however I am nonetheless not achieved speaking about Uncooked Underground.
  • So these are the foundations of Uncooked Underground primarily based on what we have realized up to now.
  • The primary rule of Uncooked Underground, clearly, is you do not discuss Uncooked Underground.
  • Wait, sorry, no that is really you at all times discuss Uncooked Underground. Please discuss it. Please?
  • Oh, that is an elimination match. Lashley eliminates Mustafai Ali.
  • The second rule of Uncooked Underground is that eye pokes are authorized, however throwing your opponent exterior of the ring after a match shouldn’t be cool.
  • Lashley shortly eliminates Ricochet.
  • The third rule of Uncooked underground is that you could finish a match — wait a minute.
  • Apollo Crews eliminates Shelton Benjamin. When Benjamin is exterior the ring, Cedric Alexander one way or the other comes out from beneath the ring (how the hell did he get there?) and pins him, successful the 24/7 title.
  • Uncooked goes to commercials.
  • Okay, so the third rule of Uncooked Underground is that match ends both when you’ve got KOed or submitted your opponent, or while you and your opponent roll out into the gang and every KO two bystanders, after which the match ends as a result of it is “sick.”
  • I am gonna inform you why Uncooked Underground does not work.
  • They’re making an attempt to this labored combating that kinda resembles MMA, with the thought being that it’ll really feel cool and gritty or no matter.
  • However there are two major causes that folks watch MMA. One is to understand the ability concerned in that kind of bodily contest.
  • the opposite is to see individuals get the shit beat out of them, see their faces puff up, their our bodies bruise, their blood circulate, after which for a killer end.
  • Uncooked Underground shouldn’t be offering both of these issues. It is not able to offering them as a result of it is a work between individuals who aren’t (for probably the most half) good MMA fighters and even MMA fighters in any respect. And so it is simply going to really feel hole and unfulfilling.
  •  Anyway, Crews eliminates MVP.
  • Now it is simply Lashley and Crews left.
  • Crews rallies. He hits his standing moonsault for a two-count.
  • Lashley reverses and goes for the Full Nelson, which Tom Phillips informs us is known as the Full Lashley.
  • Crews escapes, in all probability after studying it was referred to as the Full Lashley, however Lashley hits the spear for the win.

This was one other strong match, which makes two tonight. Damage Enterprise celebrates as Crews lays within the ring. Benjamin mimes burying Crews. Tom Phillips shills SummerSlam and Payback, which is going on the weekend after SummerSlam. Commentary runs down the SummerSlam card. You possibly can simply google it. I’ve typed sufficient phrases tonight.

Shane McMahon talks with Shayna Baszler, Jessamyn Duke, and Marina Shafir backstage. Properly, this adjustments the whole lot I simply stated, does not it? These three ARE expert MMA fights. Properly performed, Shane. Uncooked goes to commercials.

Cedric Alexander vs. Akira Tozawa – 24/7 Championship Match

  • Okay, so this can be a match that is taking place for some purpose.
  • MVP watches backstage. The ninjas are at ringside.
  • Alexander wins with the Lumbar Verify.

Shelton Benjamin assaults him after the match and wins the title again. We see a recap of what we have already seen within the final hour from Uncooked Underground. Pay attention, the people who find themselves watching at this level within the night time are the peopl who obsessively watch the present. There isn’t any want for the recaps.

Marina Shafir vs Some Jobber – Uncooked Underground

  • Shafir kicks her ass and wins on a tapout.

Nia Jax assaults Shafir after the match and takes out Duke too when she tries to get in and assist. Shayna Baszler jumps within the ring. It is about to occur, however then Nia rolls out of the ring and runs away. Shane shouts at her as she’s leaving, “the one rule is that it’s a must to struggle!” Okay, so the fourth rule of Uncooked Underground is it’s a must to struggle. So when is Shane gonna struggle?

The fifth rule of Uncooked Underground is that it is solely good when the ladies are on the market, which is definitely a rule you’ll be able to apply to most of WWE. That is the top of Uncooked Underground for tonight. Uncooked goes to commercials.

Andrade is within the ring. Zelina Vega and Angel Garza are with him. The Avenue Income come out. Zelina Vega poisoned Montez Ford, so now Ford is gonna get revenge by combating Andrade.

Andrade vs. Montez Ford

  • Ford goes shortly after Andrade…
  • …however it lasts about 10 seconds after which Andrade kicks his ass for many of the match.
  • Ford makes a comeback.
  • Zelina Vega tries to distract the ref.
  • Bianca Belair comes out and beats up Zelina.
  • Andrade is distracted and will get rolled up by Ford for the win.

Quick and to the purpose. At all times good. Shawn Michaels shakes palms and hugs Uncooked Superstars backstage as he makes his solution to the ring. Uncooked makes its solution to commercials.

Shawn Michaels involves the ring. In fact, he will get an entrance. HBK’s entrance shouldn’t be the one to overlook. What sucks is that we might lastly get a Shawn Michaels entrance with pyro once more now that WWE introduced it again… however they can not do pyro on the Efficiency Heart. You need to have achieved this on Smackdown, Shawn!

WWE Uncooked Promo – Shawn Michaels

Michaels queues up a video of Ric Aptitude’s promo from final week. Michaels then recaps the factors from Aptitude’s promo. Michaels says Ric liked performing within the ring greater than anyone, and if it wasn’t for Aptitude, there could be no Shawn Michaels, no Triple H, no Batista, no Edge, no Christian, no Large Present, and no Drew McIntyre. And Randy Orton can also be on that checklist. However Orton does not have the identical gratitude and appreciation for Aptitude as everybody else, regardless of Aptitude mentoring him for years.

Randy Orton looks like he was owed that. Michaels says he does not know it should occur, however at SummerSlam, Orton is gonna meet his justice on the finish of a Candy Chin Music or a Claymore, however he at SummerSlam, he’ll see it coming.

HBK’s music performs. Orton hits him with an RKO out of nowhere, exposing his horrifically bald head! Oh god! The humanity! Additionally, he punt-kicks him, actually shortly. McIntyre runs out, however too late. McIntyre tends to Michaels within the nook because the digicam pans in on the carnage: Shawn’s scraggly wisps of combover hair. Orton tries to assault McIntyre however McIntyre is prepared for him. He punishes Orton at ringside after which heads again in to test on Shawn.

It does not look good. From the facet, you’ll be able to actually see how Shawn has like three whole hairs grown actually lengthy and brushed again over his shiny cranium. Orton runs in once more and this time he will get the RKO on McIntyre, placing him out of the distress of getting to take a look at HBK’s as soon as superb visage ravaged by Father Time. On that miserable word, Uncooked goes off the air.

General, I favored Uncooked tonight. A whole lot of the Uncooked Underground stuff is foolish and try-hard, however the present itself was paced properly. Slicing out a whole lot of entrances and having shorter matches makes a distinction. The present drags much less, and with a three-hour runtime, dragging much less is sweet. Tomorrow is Influence, and if I am feeling frisky, perhaps I am going to watch and recap AEW Darkish as properly.


This put up is a part of a multi-part sequence: WWE Uncooked Report for August 17th, 2020.

About Jude Terror

A prophecy as soon as stated that within the comedian ebook business’s darkest days, a hero would come to guide the individuals via a plague of overpriced floppies, incentive variant covers, #1 challenge reboots, and super-mega-crossover occasions.

Sadly, that prophecy was incorrect. Oh, Jude Terror was proper. For ten years. About the whole lot. However no person listened. And so, Jude Terror has moved on to a extra essential mission: turning Bleeding Cool into a professional wrestling grime sheet!

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